A few months back we lost our sweet little doggy. It’s no where near the hardest thing I’ve been through but I took this one hard. So, of course, I wrote about it and it’s taken me until now to be able to post those words. And since then we’ve added a new furry, fluff ball to our family, despite the fact that in ten to fifteen years we will be crying over him too.
Pets, they are a bright spot. Always faithful. Unconditionally loving us. They remind us of all that is good in the world. And when they go, it’s a stinging reminder that we live in a world where death and pain reside.
Rex has been with us through it all. Saying goodbye to him is like looking through a glass into the past, particularly the painful parts, probably because he eased them so. He came to us just before I miscarried a baby at fifteen weeks. He laid with me and comforted me. He was there through the devastation of divorce. He had to figure out how to live in a tiny upstairs apartment with no dog door, while we tried to figure out how to live as a broken family. He eased the pain of transitions as he traveled back and forth with my babies to their visits. He was with us through an autism diagnosis. So many long nights he spent with my child, comforting them during those long nights of learning how to deal with meltdowns.
He was there for the wedding. For all the ups and downs that are blending a family. I’ve had him longer than I’ve had my husband. He moved across the country with us four times, four different states. He’s been the best friend to our youngest during long stretches of the big kids being away for visits, soothing her loneliness.
So you see losing him, isn’t just losing him, it’s a reminder of all the things that hurt. When he was here he was a reminder of all things good. I’m a firm believer that all good things come from God and I’m so thankful he gave us pets as one of those good things; little, messy, loving reminders of his grace. And when they go, little, messy, painful reminders of how hard life can be. Still, I wouldn’t want to miss the joy they bring despite the sadness that comes with saying goodbye. I think that’s true of most things in life. The good, worth the pain. I’d do them all over again.